Holding Back

Why
do
I
hold back?

Why
do
I
not let
myself
feel?

Why
do
I
hold up
a shield?

From
what
am I
protecting
myself?
Or someone else?

Is it loss?
Is it risk?
Is it fear?
Is it the experience?

Is it a redefinition of myself?
Is it a redefinition of someone else?
Is it including myself in someone else's self definition?
Is it including someone else in my self definition?

What is guiding me?
What is redirecting me?
If I can't define it, why do I feel it?

Why do I hold back?